Sunday, October 28, 2018

Let's start a rEvolution.

I haven't written here since March. It's been a long time...and a long time coming. What better day than this? When the WWE has the FIRST EVER ALL WOMEN'S PPV? When I have #allthefeels?

Despite having not written in months (and months), a blog post I wrote two years ago has been on my mind so much lately. This blog post about how I feel about pro wrestling has been popping into my thoughts. Today seemed like the perfect day to revisit it and delve a little deeper.

I do hope you'll read that blog post before continuing with this one, but I'm sure I can be a bit repetitive if you don't.  :)

I still remember the first time I saw WCW Monday Nitro. I was about 11 years old. It was only a few weeks later, as my obsession took root, that I would decide that I had to be a WCW Nitro Girl!

What was a Nitro Girl? They were like the cheerleaders of the wrestling world. They came out during breaks and performed dance routines. 

On two occasions, my parents took me to meet WCW Nitro Girls. My heart was full. And determined.

Thank God, eventually, I saw more women have a role around the ring and was able to transition my dream to being a valet. (Y'all, I really can't dance! BUT, I can walk down  a ramp, stand ringside, and cheer on a wrestler! Surely. Right?!)

Shortly, I started to see a number of women in the ring. The roles, however, were MUCH different than what you see today. It was more about their bodies and the sex appeal than their athletic ability. 

I was so focused on my dream. For the next five plus years, I watched, recorded, and rewatched every match and promo the women performed. I hung up so many posters that you couldn't see my walls. I read everything about these women that was available on the internet. I had a binder of printed out photos and interviews. I spent hours (and tons of paper) practicing my autograph. I knew I could go to wrestling school after high school. This was my future.

Fall of my 11th grade year, at a church event, I realized that I held wrestling on such a high pedestal that I'd made it an idol in my life. So at age 16, I gave up the dream. I stopped watching. I put WWE out of sight, out of mind.

Years later, I realized that I could watch and not make it my entire world. 

Now, the women are Superstars rather than Divas. They are seen as equal, and they have made such huge strides in sports entertainment. 

Now, though, I'm so sad. I didn't chase my dream and life goal. I just wish I had discovered the balance sooner. I realize that you're laughing. Hard. Because what 32 year old woman writes a blog post lamenting her pro-wrestling dream? This one. Watching everything leading up to WWE Evolution gives me a lump in my throat. So many of the current female superstars have stories so similar to mine.

Instead, I'll celebrate that these women have accomplished more than I ever thought I would see in the squared circle! I can be bold and strong and beautiful and do anything a man can do.

Happy Evolution, ladies. To the legends and the Hall of Famers, to the women of NXT, to the women from the Mae Young Classic, to the current superstars on the roster, I raise my glass and salute you. Thank you for all you've done and all you're going to do. You still make me think I can do anything. I love you like my own family.


Wednesday, March 21, 2018

My identity.

I got this necklace the summer after 5th grade as my mom and I drove from Jackson to our new home in Southaven. (I remember it as my first trip to Target!) It was surely "Clueless" inspired. (And yes, I still have and wear it.)

In the summer of 2016, I got this necklace at the cutest shop in town. I think the term "wifey" is so cute, and I love being a wife, so it seemed fitting and light-hearted!

Obviously, I find something I like and latch on.  ;)

Last month, I saw Jen Gotch, founder of bando, announce her collaboration with Iconery. They teamed up to release necklaces that said "Anxiety" and "Depression" to break the stigma and bring awareness to mental illness. 

As soon as I saw these, I knew I had to have one. I felt understood and seen and included. I felt like I belonged. (I've known these things are true and have felt them in my own community, but I felt it now on social media, too!) My anxiety is not something I've ever tried to hide. In fact, you can look back on this very blog and see many instances of me trying to talk it out. But this - this collaboration felt like the very thing I needed. (I guess I kind of felt like it was made for me.)

(Of course, not everyone took it that way. A portion of her followers didn't like the idea at all and had a lot of their own valid feelings.)

Now, my identity isn't just in my name or my marital status or my mental health. My identity is in being a child of God. He made me, though, and so He knew I would struggle with anxiety. He knew I would be a wife. He knew I would be Jessica even before my own parents did.

I love these necklaces and what they say about me. I'm thankful for who God made me and the role I get to play in His story.

 If you had a nameplate necklace, what would yours say?

Hope you're all having a good week!

Saturday, March 3, 2018


Y'all, I have followed Studio DIY for a while, and ever since Kelly launched #CantClutchThis, I've wanted to join! It's a monthly subscription of an amazing clutch and optional flair you can add on additionally! My only regret is that I didn't join last year because I missed SO many cute ones (especially the credit card, pool, and faux fur clutches)!!!

When I saw the February clutch announcement, I knew I couldn't miss this one! I love the clear plastic, yellow zipper, and the keychain! I had to add the keychain because it totally takes me back to the Koosh balls of my childhood!

Another optional piece of flair was THE cutest enamel pin. I have a tiny but growing collection of those, but for the sake of our budget, I'm limited to one piece of flair a month. (Except maybe for my birthday or Christmas!)

Today was a fun day, so it seemed like the perfect day to grab a Starbucks, put on my GLOW shirt, and take #shawfollowellthornton for a stroll in her new stroller. It helps that Jordan is always down to take my picture and make me smile. Thankful for days like this.


Monday, February 19, 2018

Day off!

I love days off. Especially Mondays. Three day weekends are THE best!

I've been wanting to come back here, to my blog home, to try and write again. I've determined that it'll be way more fun to do it for me - my words, my pictures - no matter how serious or silly. I always used to want my blog to take off and be my main source of income, but that's just never been in the cards for me. (And that's ok!)

So, I'm back, baby! My day off included washing sheets and blankets, lunch with my mama, coffee with my sister, and having my sweet husband take my picture for this post! 

I'm OBSESSED with these shoes from Target and this new bag I grabbed at Wal-Mart! (You can click to shop, but I'm not legit enough to make money from those links! hahaha)

I'm happy to be back here in my space. I hope I can pop in with things that I love or things that matter to me much more often - especially since I've taken all the pressure off myself!

Happy mid-February, friends!


P.S. Thanks to Jordan for being the best husband he can be for me - and for coming after work to take my pictures.

Sunday, August 13, 2017

I'm still here!

I haven't posted anything here in FIVE MONTHS. That's insane. Can we think back to when this blog started five years ago, and I wanted to become an actual, legit blogger? In my heart, I still do. It's just hard to live up to the expectations I have for myself.

I've had a note saved in my phone for months. I had planned to post around my birthday in May. You know, the one where I turned 31? Thirty-one. Holy mackerel. Time is flying by. Years are going by as fast as weekends do. I guess I could share some of that note now. (There's no time like the present.)

I want to be a good daughter, Christian, wife, sister, friend, blogger, and employee. 
But what I mean by "good" is perfect...
And I want to write meaningful fiction and live in a gorgeous house.
I want to only have one chin but still eat ALL the donuts.
I wish I used my time to keep a clean house always.
I want to have a successful line of Disney shirts or a well-known YouTube channel.
But what if I have cared about my ideal life and being right about trivial things more than I have valued the gospel?
It's sobering how many years have passed and how many dreams I've dreamt but never pursued. Now I'm older (too old for some, maybe), and I'm realizing that I must act now in order to not live a life wasted.
So, even if I only ever write one ebook that only my mom and husband read, I have to start on something. 
I want 31 to be full of tacos, fun, happiness, laughter, joy, a growing faith, and a lot of gratitude.

I've only had one panic attack in 2017. Praise God from Whom all blessings flow. But you know what it was about? Lies from the devil. That maybe I didn't pray the salvation prayer good enough. That maybe I didn't "get saved" right. That maybe my little faith isn't enough. But you know what else? I have praying friends and family and a God that never gives up on me. If you'd like, I'm accepting any and all prayers for the devil to take a hike these days.

I'm (thankfully) on the launch team for Dance Stand Run by Jess Connolly. It's now available for pre-order, and I can promise that you will not want to miss the truth in these pages. (Also, there are some amazing pre-order gifts, so DanceStandRun, but don't walk!)

I know this post is a little bit ALL OVER THE PLACE, but welcome to my mind-dump, you know?  :) I'm happy you've read this, if you have, and I'm thankful for your time.

Here's hoping that I actually get back to posting more regularly, as I feel like I always have feelings to share and things to say.

Have an amazing week, friends.


Wednesday, March 15, 2017

A Wife's Secret to Happiness

Jen Weaver's new book, A Wife's Secret to Happiness, is out now!!!!! It released yesterday, and Amazon already sold out! (Well, now it shows one in stock  so if you're lucky, it could be yours!) Don't worry though - restock is in progress. You can order it here!

I was lucky enough to get to be on the launch team for this book, and I'm still so excited about it. Truthfully, I'm still reading it. Sigh. I haven't finished it. Non-fiction can be hard for me. It's always challenging because I feel like it requires some sort of action. (Also, I'm mainly beating myself up for not finishing it in time to write this post. BUT. I'm moving forward and am so thankful I got to be a part of the team!)

In each chapter, Jen includes a real life #wifestylin story from another wife! I love that so much. She didn't just want this book to be about her and what she's learned - she wanted other wives to share their stories as well!

I'm eager to continue my journey through this book, and I can't wait to apply what I'm reading and learning to my life. So thankful for Jen's obedience to the Lord in writing this book!


Thursday, February 2, 2017

My Most Influential Self

Did you know that I recently attended the Influence Conference in Nashville? It was my first time attending after wanting to for YEARS, and it was the last conference. The timing was certainly perfect for me, and I feel like I saw and heard exactly what I was supposed to see and hear.

On the morning of January 14, I walked into a gorgeous church in Nashville. I was eager to meet more faces that I'd only known online. (I got to meet several at an Influence Network member's only event the previous night!) I was expectant and hopeful to hear something that rang true from each of the incredible teachers. Obviously, I heard more than I could even jot down in my notebook. 

Jess Connolly was the first speaker, and her words rocked my world. It has been weeks, and I am still thinking of them daily. (Partially because I knew I needed to write this post and wasn't making the time to do it. Tonight seems like the right time.)

Jess described a retreat she had attended where they described their broken selves and their ideal selves. 

My broken self is the junk-food loving, reality tv binging, spending money because I like stuff, responsibility procrastinating self. 

My ideal self is the 30-year old who has a great skincare routine, accepts my body for how it is, loves my job, is able to balance my checkbook to the penny, is a spectacular wife/daughter/sister/friend, is the perfect balance of introvert/extrovert, is always appropriately energized, and is, like, SO CUTE. 

BUT, as Jess pointed out, "My ideal self is not my most influential self. Who is your ideal self? Picture her. There is freedom in stopping trying to be her! Influence has nothing to do with worldly assignment but has everything to do with being an eternal ambassador."

It was really as Jess was telling us these things aloud that I realized I compare myself most to my ideal self. Sure, my ideal self is made up of the best components that other people share on Instagram, but I'm stuck in the hamster wheel of trying to only be that girl.

So, on IF: Gathering Eve, it only seemed appropriate to go back over the notes I took during her talk and write this post. (I do wish I could just let you hear her entire talk for yourself. It was BEYOND.)

Here's what I'm shattering about my ideal self:

I don't fit into the clothes I fit into when I was 22, but I'm tired of blaming my anxiety meds or my metabolism for the body I have now. I either want to learn to exercise to get a banging body and/or I want to accept the one God gave me. I feel certain there's a healthy balance.

I sometimes go right to bed without taking my makeup off. This doesn't mean I'm failing as an adult.

If I wait until my home is clean and just how I always hoped it would look (#Pinterest), I will certainly miss out on loving others well in a comfortable space.

I can't wait until I grow up and turn into my dreamy, ideal self. That's not who I'm made to be. This life really isn't about me after all. Jess said, "We were put on earth to bring people into the marvelous light - not for any other reason."

All of that to say, we are created to be FREE in the Lord. The gospel is true, and it's for all of us. Go in to the weekend with this in your mind.

Love you,